23
Apr
stored in: Sam's Rant
If you have ever used Aliens, you probably already love them. If you don’t love them then you need to get your mind correct, and recognize just “what it is” that is really and truly good (Aliens, of course). We just brought in another shipment and don’t expect to keep them around for very long. Ever since these gizmos invaded planet earth they have developed a following among the brightest and most hardcore of earthling climbers.
Q: So just how did Aliens make their way to our humble little planet?
A: Well they sure weren’t invented by humans, despite what CCH and the CIA might have you believe. No, they were transported here directly from Venus by the hardest rocking band in the universe: Valiant Thor.
Q: So you expect us to believe that a bunch of grungy MC5 wannabes with their sleeveless denim jackets brought Aliens to Earth form Venus?
A: Yes.
Q: So just how hard does Valiant Thor rock?
A: See for yourself.
Q: Supposing that I want to purchase some Aliens right this instant, where should I go?
A: If you are anywhere around the front range of Colorado, WildyX is the only place; all other nearby retailers simply lack the conviction, gumption and hardcoreness to carry them. There are also many convenient locations on the planet Venus.
Happy climbing,
Sam
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